Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Thu Jan 06 2011

10:29 AM #
Really lookin' forward to the weekend, you guys.

10:38 AM #
Just spent 20 minutes at Subway convincing the guy to make me a meatball sub without any bread. Why is that so hard, Tito?

10:39 AM #
And yes, I want ranch on it. I don't need the sideways look. I'm on a diet. Sue me for trying to get in shape. What a jerk.

10:41 AM #
And, don't ask me if I want chips when I'm not supposed to have chips. Really insensitive. Probably won't go back.

10:43 AM #
Plus, he wrapped it all weird and the sauce leaked on the car seat. I should take the cleaning bill to the manager. Maybe get a free sub.

06:30 PM #
Suppertime. Eating a summer sausage. The whole thing. (keep the jokes to a minimum, it's part of my diet) Ha!

06:31 PM #
Dave's already made a bunch of cracks. He's such a loser. Doesn't get that everyone's cool with the gays now. Plus I'm super not gay.

06:45 PM #
Can't wait for Saturday! It's my cheat day. Gonna keep it low key tomorrow with a few Michelob Ultras. Really proud of myself.