Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Feb 18 2011

09:42 AM #
"Here's to good friends, this Friday's kinda special." Happy Friday to ya, you guys!

09:49 AM #
Ken turned me onto You Tube. Remember this one? Really takes me back.

09:54 AM #
Why don't they make ads with real guy's guys in 'em anymore? Who can relate to some idiot on a horse?! That's just stupid.

10:49 AM #
Oh, here we go again with the "who broke the toilet tank lid?" routine. Give it a rest you old cow. Makes me wanna puke up my Arby's.

12:50 PM #
Great, now we're gonna have a meeting about "respecting the workplace." Looks like I'm gonna have a meeting about "having diarrhea."

01:49 PM #
Might have to make it a Michelob night. Lovin this YouTube you guys. This is another classic!

03:39 PM #
Picked up some Michelobs on the way home. Skipped that stupid meeting. Seriously, diarrhea, you guys. It works every time.

04:05 PM #
Don't know where Dave is. Gonna fire up the Weber again for a couple of burgers, and maybe a brat. Brats go great with Michelob.

06:30 PM #
Went outside to light the grill. Door locked behind me. Was outside for 2 hrs waiting for Dave. 35 degrees. Good thing the coals lit.

06:36 PM #
Friggin Dave clicked that button on the knob we never use. I'm all covered in soot from standing over the coals. Really steamed.

06:44 PM #
Used up all the charcoal to keep warm. Gotta get cleaned up and go to the store. Dave's lucky I'm not dead the pete's sake.

09:26 PM #
Finally got the burgers and brats cooked. Gotta wake up Dave for supper. He went hog wild on the Michelobs and crashed. Sissy.

09:59 PM #
Dave woke up, ate 2 burgers and a brat with his hands, said nothing, and went back to sleep on the couch. Ever hear of "thank you?!" Ass.

10:04 PM #
Screw Dave. I hid a backup sixer in the veggie drawer. Muted Golf Channel and crankin some Allman Brothers. All I need, baby.

11:39 PM #
I miss my boat. Sick of this crap. Going to bed, you guys.