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DadBoner - Mon May 30 2011

12:58 PM #
Got pretty messed up at Ann's yesterday. Went pretty heavy on the margs & she was all out of the eats. Ate potato salad on a hot dog bun.

01:01 PM #
A potato salad dog isn't actually too bad when you're bombed if you kick up the flavors with some spicy mustard and my secret seasonings.

01:06 PM #
Got into it pretty bad with Tina Carlson. She called me "Big Karl", got steamed and muttered that she was a "big gross bitch." She heard me.

01:09 PM #
When I'm bombed on margs, you do NOT want to get in the ring with me, especially is you look like Tina Carlson. I know great insults.

01:10 PM #
For the record, I'd never call a woman the b-word if I wasn't provoked and/or drunk on a holiday. You have to respect the ladies, you guys.

01:12 PM #
Guess I took my shirt off to show Tina my beach bod. She started laughing. I may have a stomach, but it's firm, not like Tina's sloppers!

01:14 PM #
Tina's husband Doug, who's a real load, got all P.O.d that I was burning Tina, so I challenged him to a pose down, like a real man.

01:16 PM #
Doug wouldn't even take his shirt off for the pose down. Just walked away like a wuss. He really embarrassed himself.

01:21 PM #
Got pretty exhausted from all the confrontation and margs. Fell asleep on the deck with no shirt in a lawn chair. Ann locked me out there.

01:45 PM #
Gonna patch myself up. Me & Dave are gonna do it right for the troops. Brats, ribs, all the trimmings, Cool Ranch Doritos. Big big spread.

01:49 PM #
Dave just made a STRONG batch of rum punch. Goin down so smooth. Fruit juice gets you hydrated as well as gives the body nutrients.