Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Tue Jun 14 2011

11:13 AM #
Got a "wrap" for lunch. It's like havin a terrible burrito and a crappy sandwich all at the same time. Worst of both worlds. Healthy though.

02:20 PM #
This health kick is rough, but worth it I guess. Keep craving pizza with mayo on it. Gotta stay strong, you guys.

02:24 PM #
Sometimes I can't decide whether I like Miracle Whip or mayo better. Miracle Whip has more flavor, but mayo is just such a classic.

02:25 PM #
Feel light headed from all this dieting. Could really use some Vitamin Mayo right now.

02:35 PM #
What I DON'T like about Miracle Whip is their new commercial. Real turn off. Why is that slimy guido guy badmouthing M-Dubs? Got no right.

02:38 PM #
That greaseball in the M-Dubs commercial should shut his face and hit the bricks back to pizza town where he belongs. Who needs you!

02:46 PM #
I'm takin a stand. No more Miracle Whip until that goon is off the air from talkin bad about Miracle Whip. Stand up and be heard, you guys.