Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Thu Jul 21 2011

11:15 AM #
Really lookin' forward to the weekend, you guys.

11:39 AM #
Beat the heat and kept it healthy today with the Arby's Angus Cool Deli Sandwich. Cold sandwiches are lower in cals than oven baked ones.

11:43 AM #
I should've just hung out at Arby's all day. The AC was blasting, and I could pretty much just soak in that Arby's aroma forever.

11:50 AM #
They should make bathroom air fresheners like Arby's Smell, Beer Brats, or Supreme Pizza. Only gals should cover up their bm's with lilacs.

01:07 PM #
AC still won't work. Figured as much so I wore my swim trunks. If nosey lady has a problem with it, it's easy access to kiss my white butt.

01:11 PM #
Saw a white guy workin on the AC. Shoulda hired a mexican. Whites do halfass jobs at manual labor 'cause they think they're too good for it.

01:15 PM #
Thinkin about my manly bathroom air freshener spray idea, Taco would NOT be a good scent. Taco smell is only good when it's tacos, you guys.

01:17 PM #
If you smell taco smell, and it's not tacos, it's either butthole, armpits, or some immigrant who doesn't know our customs. Plain & simple.

03:06 PM #
Was pushin' out a long Arby's stinky in the john. Legs stuck to the seat, crashed back down & broke the toilet tank lid again. Sick of this.

03:10 PM #
I'm NOT paying for that. No AC at work makes it hazardous to use the toilet. It's like makin #2 in a third world country if they had Arby's.