Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Mon Aug 01 2011

12:16 AM #
Back from Crazy Cooter's. Had a few brewskis to be polite. Hooked me up with a riotous dangly cross earring. Gonna swap for a hoop though.

12:18 AM #
Ear's pretty banged up from the piercing. Gonna hit the sack. Hope the swelling goes down in the AM. Looks badass though.

07:11 AM #
Can't sleep. Ear's hurtin bad from the piercing. Think Dave botched it. I do kinda have a Dog Bounty Hunter look goin so I can't be too mad.

07:14 AM #
Gonna pound a couple cold ones and try to catch a few more zzz's.

12:43 PM #
Soaked my ear in rubbing alcohol. Burned like an s.o.b. Shoulda cleaned the earring from Crazy Cooter but didn't want to look like a siss.

02:53 PM #
Dave had a great idea for Captain Karl's Pizza Ship; Ranch Corn Nut Pizza. Oh, did I say "great?" I meant "stupid." What a doofus.

03:03 PM #
Corn Nuts are swell by themselves, but someone could lose a tooth on one and then it's lawsuit time. Cheetos are a better topping option.