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DadBoner - Thu Aug 04 2011

11:44 AM #
Just got back from the bank. The manager at that branch is a real assclown who clearly knows nothing about exciting business ventures.

11:47 AM #
Told the bank manager how Captain Karl's Pizza Ship would be all about top shelf margs, Cheeto toppings, and babes cans. He didn't "get" it.

11:50 AM #
He was concerned that I never owned a restaurant before. What's to know except bold flavors, value booze, and busty sea wench waitresses?

11:56 AM #
Told the bank manager about the complimentary Triscuits & Mayo. He looked like he was gonna laugh. Almost crushed his face in.

11:57 AM #
I don't think I got the loan because of my 'rang. Squares never like to help out a rebel with a dream just because their lives suck ass.

12:02 PM #
The bank manager also thought "buy 11 get 1 free" top shelf margs was "dangerous." I wonder what color panties he wears? Probably pink.

12:05 PM #
Was so steamed that I stood up at the bank manager's desk and told him how when I get Captain Karl's Pizza Ship up & going I'd be back...

12:06 PM #
...to shove it in his face and take his wife out for the hottest date she's ever had. Show what it's like to get with a real macho man.

12:08 PM #
That's when the security guard escorted me out. Told him I wasn't some animal and I'd go quietly. I'm not some ghetto maniac.

12:18 PM #
Went out in the parking lot of the bank, put on Stranglehold & wailed on the gas like I was gonna plow through the window. Had to get it on.

12:20 PM #
When the bank manager came outside, I psyched him out like he was gonna get run down by the Sebring. Gave him the finger & peeled out.

12:23 PM #
To be fair, I probably shouldn't have had 4 Crown & Diets before my bank loan meeting, but I wanted to be loose and conversational.

12:28 PM #
Screw goin back to work today. I'm goin to Chili's to cool off. Sick of this, you guys.

03:49 PM #
If you're feeling blue and in a psychotic rage, nothing brings you back to normal like a nice afternoon at Chili's, you guys. Hits the spot.