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DadBoner - Fri Aug 05 2011

12:34 PM #
Had to go back to work today. Sucks. Really lookin' forward to the weekend, you guys.

03:40 PM #
No one even said anything about my new earring today. They must be jealous. People in the midwest are always afraid of new fashions.

03:43 PM #
Got to work today and some a-hole had put a Burger King crown at my workspace. You take one BK dumpster crap and you're a joke.

03:46 PM #
Screw these lowlifes. It's quittin time. Headin to Cold One City. Can I get a HELL YEAH?! 'Cause Stone Cold Karl Welzein said so.

05:56 PM #
Dave wants to watch Cocktail. Why WATCH Cocktail when we can LIVE Cocktail. Gonna show him my bar tricks from way back.

06:09 PM #
Just broke a bottle of Blue Curacao on the coffee table. Little rusty on my Cocktail moves. Probably shoulda warmed up with plastic.

06:27 PM #
Dave's all steamed that there's Blue Curacao and glass everywhere. Why does he care?! He's had that bottle since 1996.

06:33 PM #
Dave's complaining that I ruined his Far Side coffee table book with Blue Curacao. Hey doesn't even get those nerd jokes anyway. Idiot.

06:39 PM #
Jeez Louise. Dave with his "glass everywhere" whining. We'll just wear shoes this weekend til I can hire a black cleanin gal to clean it up.

06:41 PM #
No offense to black gals who are cleaning ladies. It's a noble job. To be fair, mexicans are usually the best. Then Polish, but they smell.

07:05 PM #
Great, Dave's trackin Blue Curacao all over the pad. Just because I broke the bottle on the table, doesn't mean he isn't to blame for this.

07:09 PM #
Dave acts like this is the 1st time the whole floor's been sticky. What about that time he sprayed Faygo all over like those clown buffoons?

07:12 PM #
What kind of idiot wastes a 2liter of Faygo Red Pop just to be like some dumb bags of trash in Kiss makeup? Dave was weird that summer.

07:15 PM #
Gettin sick of Dave complaining. Makin a roadie and headin to Arby's. MY party goes from 10:15-?, you guys. RSVPs not necessary.

10:34 PM #
Lookin back, I shoulda done something cool like been a rockstar or opened up a Pizza Hut franchise. So much wasted time, you guys.

10:37 PM #
Gonna go polish off this Jim Beam in my Sebring and listen to some Seger. Bob sounds better in the car. Maybe he has the answers.