Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Mon Nov 21 2011

11:49 AM #
Really lookin' forward to the Turkey Day weekend, you guys.

11:54 AM #
No need to put in any effort at work this week. No point to it. It's a short week. Best to take it easy and gear up for the celebraish.

12:07 PM #
Workin on plans for the Turkey Day feast. Might see what Ann & the kids are up to. Help her stuff her bird. Ha! (just some guy humor)

12:10 PM #
Turkey Day is the time when we show those filthy Indians how we took the USA and made it bigger and badder. Really shove it in their face.

12:15 PM #
Scary how if the Indians were still in charge, we'd all be drunk diseased animals. Sometimes you have to slaughter the weak for humanity.

12:26 PM #
I'm not one for violence against other peoples. That's the government's job, you guys. Just have to trust that the USA does it best.

12:30 PM #
Some people are sensitive about how we treated the Indians in the war. But I bet if there was news coverage like now, they'd see different.

12:36 PM #
The Pilgim/Indian War is kinda like Iraq. It was for the best, but very unfortunate the blood of the lesser man had to be shed.

12:48 PM #
Wish we could all go back in time and live hand in hand with the Indian peoples. So much we could have learned with today's technology.

12:49 PM #
In olden times, war was the only answer. But now, I think we coulda been cool with the Indians. All colors are equal in 2011.

01:22 PM #
The secret to my bird is the brine. Turns out so moist. Bold succulent flavors. Really off the chain. Brine or die, you guys.

02:07 PM #
Ann says I can stop by, but she cooks a terrible bird. Gonna really wow her when I bring over my brined bad boy. Give hers to the dog.

05:06 PM #
Did some research on Turkey Day tonight. Turns out it has nothin to do with with a war on Indians. Sad how the media twists everything.

05:09 PM #
Turkey Day is a co-celebraish between the white man and the natives, you guys. They were super pumped for the bold flavors of the new world.

05:20 PM #
Guess Indians are real serious 'bout bein called Native Americans. Thought it was an either/or. Wonder if Cleveland'll change their name?

05:23 PM #
Plus, The Cleveland Native Americans would be a badass name for a baseball team. Wonder why those corncobs haven't changed it? So offensive.

05:37 PM #
Pumped to take everyone at work to school about the TRUE history of Turkey Day. Really shove it in their face. Make everyone feel stupid.

09:15 PM #
Got a 25lb. bird. Puttin it in my brine tonight. Really give it time to soak up the bold flavors of my secret spices. Gonna be out of bounds