Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Feb 03 2012

09:45 AM #
Happy Friday, you guys. Really draggin'. Stayed up late with Peanut watchin' Soul Train clips on the internet.

09:49 AM #
Woke up & Peanut was watchin' this over and over: http://t.co/WrOs4o2G Teary eyed, he said, "why everything get so f*cked up K-Money?"

09:52 AM #
Told Peanut, except for the bold flavor revolution, everything in this country seems to move backwards sometimes, you have LOOK for good.

09:59 AM #
Always thought Nickelback were corncobs til Dave told me they do the WWE Raw theme. That song rocks. Gotta keep an open mind to new things.

10:11 AM #
Told Peanut, I don't LIKE Nickelback but I'll rock Burn It To The Ground when I'm real pumped to party in the 'Bring. Gotta take advantage.

10:16 AM #
Folks that say everything sucks now are just lazy. It takes a Indiana Jones to be the first man to try Mango Hab wings. Macho trailblazin.

10:21 AM #
Good taste comes down to your filter. When I get a new rock tee from Kohls, I only get the BEST one, not 10 of 'em & water down my 'drobe.

10:51 AM #
A good song's a good song. A good tee's a good tee. A good flick's a good flick. People like to write off fun stuff just to look smart.

10:57 AM #
Remember Ken gave me crap for seein Transformers 3. Yeah? Guess what? Like that'll matter when we're both dead. I like explosions. So sorry.

10:59 AM #
I have a dream there'll come a day when all these hotshots'll stop actin' like they're too good for McRibs, cold ones, and rock n roll.

12:26 PM #
Started on my Super Bowl Celebraish 2012 shoppin' list. #1: Plenty of ice. No one wants a bathwater Crown & Diet.

12:28 PM #
SBCSL 2012- #2: Cold ones. Good variety. Never know when your taste'll change when you're a 12 pack deep. Might need a bold flavor brew.

12:30 PM #
SBCSL 2012- #3: Shrimp platter. For VIPs only. No "friends of friends." Kind of an unwritten rule but it's best to make a sign to be safe.

12:33 PM #
SBCSL 2012- #4: Lil' Smokies. Real crowd pleaser. Have to get the Crock Pot outta Dave's room. Don't know what he does with it in there.

12:37 PM #
SBCSL 2012- #5: Full chip spread. 'Ritos, Ruffles, 'Tos, Yuns, Rinds, Scoops. No store brand. The works.

12:44 PM #
Nothin' says, "I could give a crap if you're at my home" like store brand snacks. Just spend your time alone if you wanna have no class.

07:32 PM #
SBCSL 2012- #6: Fixins' for Captain Karl's Pizza Ship Dip. The bold flavors you crave from a supreme 'za all in 1 dip from the Italian seas.

07:53 PM #
Legend has is that Italian sailors didn't have ovens to cook dough. Cravin' 'za, they made Pizza Dip. Captain Karl keeps that tradish alive.

07:56 PM #
"Captain Karl's has the bold flavors you crave on his all new Bold Cravors menu." Gotta put that in my CKPS notebook for later.

07:59 PM #
Got a buttload a cold ones for the Super Celebraish. Couldn't fit nothin else in the cart. Told Dave we could have a few if he replaces em.

08:01 PM #
Feel like I could drink a thousand beers right now, you guys. Goin' down so smooth.