Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Feb 24 2012

12:15 PM #
Im your Friday man, stop me when I'm passin by. Im your Friday man, stop me when I'm passin by. See all my weekend is guaranteed to satisfy!

12:16 PM #
Happy Friday to ya, you guys!

12:27 PM #
Picked up the new Van Halen album at Best Buy. Good to see the boys back together with Diamond Dave. Keepin it in my pocket. Looks badass.

12:30 PM #
Might have to hit Paddy's later. Might be some babes there that'll wanna hear the new Van Halen in the 'Bring. Then it's Makeout City, USA.

12:35 PM #
If a babe hears Diamond Dave's pipes after a few top shelf margs and still wants her top on, she probably ain't into guys. That's a fact.

12:38 PM #
Sammy Hagar brings out the bold party vibe, but if you really want electric carnal passions, then it's Diamond Dave all the way, you guys.

12:41 PM #
"Hey Karl, is that the new Van Halen album?!" Damn right. "Wow. I really hate that we're not listening to it in your car." Let's roll.

12:47 PM #
If I'm talkin' to a babe, and she says she isn't into Van Halen? I give her the thumbs down and walk away. That's just a personal rule.

12:51 PM #
If you hear Van Halen's "Somebody Get Me A Doctor" and don't wanna pound a thousand cold ones like a god, you better check your pulse.

03:06 PM #
If there's one thing no one can judge you for, it's bein' a Van Halen man. Anyone who does is just a piece of trash.

03:09 PM #
Can't wait to head out with my new Van Halen cd JUST peakin outta my pocket. It's a subtle power move that makes the babes crave your touch.

05:15 PM #
Whoa, it's lent or some crap already?! Gonna hit Mickey D's for a Filet O Fish before headin out. Gotta take advantage. And it's respectful.