Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Sat Mar 24 2012

01:29 PM #
Really hurtin' today, you guys. Took down a 12 of BL 'Nums last night. So crisp and powerful. Like blue lightning.

01:32 PM #
Gonna head to Arby's. Always hits the spot. Goin for the Super Reuben. Piled high and only for a limited time. Gotta take advantage.

01:34 PM #
Arby's always helps you clean out your guts after a rough night. It's explosive bm food. That's how you know the healing process is workin.

01:36 PM #
Arby's, it's hate yourself from the night before so you might as well just shovel in some bold flavors to take away the sadness mood food.

01:37 PM #
Arby's, you'll blow up the john in no time mood food, you guys.

01:39 PM #
Got that damn Arby's song stuck in my head. So steamed. Wanna choke that guy out. Wish I could get my mitts on him behind the scenes.

01:40 PM #
Arby's, just give me my sandwich and shut up with your stupid song, ya piece of trash, mood food.

01:42 PM #
Might have to give Arby's a piece of my mind when I'm there. Let em know how I'm bein tortured with their song. See how THEY like hearin it.

01:47 PM #
Great, now I'm all P.O.'d. Makin' a Greyhound roadie. Goin' to Arby's. It's good...SHUT UP YOU CORNCOB! Feel so bonkers today, you guys.

04:56 PM #
Just blasted out a massive Arby's Seup Reub BM. Really devastating. The john is definitely not a place to be in a good mood right now.

04:58 PM #
Sat in the corner booth at Arb's, sayin', "It's good mooood foooood" for about 20 minutes before they asked me to leave. Really showed 'em.

04:59 PM #
Told the manager at Arb's, "Why's it ok for you to blare your crap jingle in MY pad, but I can't scream it here? Riddle me that, corncob."

05:01 PM #
Arb's manager said, "Regardless, you can't drink a beverage from outside in here, sir." It's not a beverage, it's a Greyhound.

05:04 PM #
If a place don't sell booze, I don't see why you can't bring your own. Especially if you class it up in an '84 Tigers Little Caesar's glass.

05:10 PM #
Told Arb's manager I'd be writin a letter to corporate about the incident. Got all maniac style. Slammed my 'hound and walked out.

05:14 PM #
Got another 12 of Blue Lightning. Gonna flush it all down & fade away into Saturday night. Put the ship on auto pilot, see where it docks.

05:20 PM #
Round 8pm, 6 cold ones deep on a Saturday, a real man needs to step back, look to Seger, and think, "What's MY power move gonna be tonight?"