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DadBoner - Sun Apr 01 2012

11:11 AM #
Really hurtin today, you guys. Had a blast at the NCAA celebraish. Woke up on Ken's couch this mornin. Think his wife said I could crash.

11:12 AM #
Ken's wife is pretty smokin. Like she could have been on the hood of a car in a Whitesnake video before she had kids. Made me kinda steamed.

11:15 AM #
Ken's an alright guy. But I'm the alpha male. His wife is just goin to waste. B+ caboose, rockin chest beefers? Man, I'd hold her so tight.

11:22 AM #
Ken's wife had long hair with the high front. Really dig that. Shows she's carnally avail. When babes cut it off, ya know they're ice boxed.

11:27 AM #
Remember when Ann got her first "soccer mom cut." Her friends said it was "so cute." Don't think I ever saw her topless after that.

11:33 AM #
Shoulda seen Ken's face when I showed up with the BL 'Nums & Loco D'Reets. He was so surprised. I could tell 'cause he kept tellin me.

11:40 AM #
Good thing I got Ken's address off a Time mag on his desk. Party woulda ate it. Was just a few corncob neighbors, and Ken's oolala wife.

11:44 AM #
No one from work showed up. Figured it meant alot to Ken that I came, so I decided to really rock it out. Got my Case Logic from the 'Bring.

11:46 AM #
Had 5 BL 'Nums before I got to Ken's so I was loose and conversational. Went straight for the Whitesnake. Thought Ken's wife might feel it.

11:48 AM #
Had to teach everyone that you don't LISTEN to a basketball game, you WATCH it. What you LISTEN to, is Still of The Night by Whitesnake.

11:54 AM #
Guess Ken could tell his wife was gettin' ideas about my mad swag, 'cause they went into the other room to have a talk.

11:58 AM #
Can't blame Ken. When 3:57 in Still of the Night by Whitesnake hits, & I'm rockin' the pony, 'rang, & 'logne, babes go off the chain carnal.

12:03 PM #
Decided to make it up to Ken for gettin his oolala wife hot & bothered. Slipped the Timehouse I made out of his Time on his coffee table.

12:06 PM #
Ken & his wife were gone for a long time. No one else was social, so I just played it cool in the corner, poundin' BL 'Nums & Loco D'reets.

12:08 PM #
If you're at a party, and everyone is cold, just find a corner, turn up the Whitesnake, and make it red hot like a thousand suns, you guys.

12:11 PM #
Could tell some of the other neighbors were bothered by my mad swag. Hubbies started gettin real comfy cozy with the wives, then left.

12:16 PM #
Guess I give off kind of a sensual outlaw vibe. If you ain't takin' care of your babe, you better, or she'll get natural in my direction.

12:22 PM #
Guess I crushed too many Loco D'reets, so I had to call a T.O. on the hot corner and break for the john. Was in there for a while.

12:25 PM #
Could hear Ken and Oolala talkin' in the kitchen about me. Pretty heated. Guess she was into me 'cause Ken kept sayin he wanted me to leave.

12:29 PM #
Kinda filled the john with my Loco D'reet cleanup. Seemed impolite to ask for a plunger though. Didn't want to interrupt their convo.

12:32 PM #
After I blew up the john, I felt bad and wanted Ken to feel less threatened, so insisted on a BL 'Num pound off. Call it "Blue Lightning."

12:33 PM #
Ken said, "maybe you should leave." Told him, "It's cool. Lets get comfortable." Took down about 5 BL 'Nums in 15 minutes.

12:34 PM #
Ken's wife went to bed. Guess she thought it was best if the carnal tension was out of the room so me and Ken could have a guy to guy.

12:36 PM #
Musta had a blast, 'cause I blacked out after. Woke up on the couch & hit the bricks. Had to flip the cushions. I'm a thoughtful guest.

12:38 PM #
The best memories are usually the ones other people have to remember for you the next day, you guys.

02:47 PM #
Gonna take it easy today. Really beat. Gotta catch a few cowboy z's. Well earned ridin' the party range.

03:43 PM #
Dave just woke me up. Said he had to talk, guy to guy. Told me Ann stopped by last night when I was at Ken's. And they made it. MADE it?!

03:45 PM #

03:46 PM #
Punched a hole in the wall. Threw the microwave across the room. Goin' for a drive. Need to think about some things.