Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Aug 03 2012

11:45 AM #
Happy Friday to ya, you guys. Got this bad boy to support Team USA. Wearin' it with pride. (No sleeves for extra pride) http://t.co/Tvuw73lv

11:50 AM #
Wonder why Stone Cold Steve Austin's never been in the olympics? Woulda loved to see him stun some french corncob back to cheese town.

11:52 AM #
When it comes to the USA, even if you beat us on the scoreboard, at the end of the day, man, we still kicked your ass from the start.

12:01 PM #
Watched some gymnastics last night. (women's only) They really need to put the ages on the screen to keep the creeps from thinkin' carnally.

12:04 PM #
If you tune in to an olympic program, and there's a smokin caboose on the screen, keep your urges in check before havin thoughts, you guys.

12:07 PM #
Gals' olympic sports need to have a bar on the bottom of the screen that says, WARNING: UNDERAGE ACTION. KEEP YOUR BRAIN RATED G. NOT COOL.

12:10 PM #
One time, Crazy Cooter said, "Old enough to pee, old enough for me." Kinda concerning. Gotta respect the ladies, you guys.

12:14 PM #
I like a nice thick and juicy mature babe myself. All natural, aged to perfection, and piled high with all the toppings.

12:25 PM #
A true bad boy knows that fat bottomed girls make the rockin' world go 'round, you guys.

05:31 PM #
Feel like I could drink a thousand beers right now, you guys. Team USA style.