Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Tue Oct 02 2012

11:11 AM #
Super pumped for the Tigers big win. Musta drank a thousand beers last night. For Miggy, Papa Grande, Jimmy L., everyone really. So proud.

11:17 AM #
Brought a 12 of Stroh's to work. Thought we could toast the Tigers together. Maybe start a little tradish? Nosey Lady said absolutely not.

11:20 AM #
So disappointed. I try to do nice things like get everyone to bond at work, over cold ones during work, MY TREAT, and I get crapped on.

11:24 AM #
What if Austin Jackson, Prince, and Verlander stopped by work and we weren't drinkin' cold ones, havin' a celebraish? Be so disappointed.

11:30 AM #
I've your team wins somethin' big, you should be able to drink booze at work the next day. Needs to be a USA law, you guys.

11:57 AM #
Bet everyone at Little Caesar's is drinkin' today. Deliverin' 'za, slammin' cold ones. Wish I worked at Little Caesar's. Could be a blast?

12:10 PM #
If I worked at Little Caesar's, I could probably be the #1 driver in America. Hangin' with babes on stops, gettin' parties started. Man.

12:13 PM #
I JUST WANNA DRINK AT WORK AND MAYBE HAVE A JOB AT LITTLE CAESAR'S IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK!? Sick of this. So frustrating.

12:17 PM #
I could be the first and only official Hot 'N Ready driver. "You want it Hot 'N Ready at your door? You call 5 Dollar Karl."

12:21 PM #
2 babes: "Where'd you get that Hot 'n Ready pie?" "5 Dollar Karl. He's on point." Me: (Tip shades, peel out.) Be a rockin' commercial.

12:25 PM #
Goin' to drink some Stroh's in the 'Bring. It's so hard to be a big idea man when you're locked in the work slave cage. Feelin' down.