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DadBoner - Sun Dec 30 2012

12:11 PM #
Really lookin' forward to the NYE celebraish, you guys.

12:42 PM #
Could sure use a Lions W today. Paired up with the State B-Dubs Bowl win could really close out the year rockin'.

01:06 PM #
So steamed right now.

01:11 PM #
The Lions just stink. They always stink. So sick of this. A Michigan man deserves better. I crave perfection! Gonna get bombed, you guys.

01:15 PM #
My football team shouldn't be such a pile of hot steamers! My name's Karl Welzein, not Crap Stinkzone. Really P.O.'d. Crown. Shots. Now.

01:23 PM #
The Lion's should just change the logo on their helmet to a big brown steamin' cat turd. Maybes have some flies around it for added detail.

01:28 PM #
Lions stink, 'Stones stink, Tigers lost, Wings can't play. So sick of this. It's like Detroit is God's toilet, and he's got the juicy runs.

01:31 PM #
Goin' to grunt out an angry premie with a cold one. Need some toilet therapy.

04:24 PM #
Feelin' better. Sometimes you just need a hot sit down in the john to hard grunt your anger & anxiety into the bowl. Saw that on Dr. Phil.

07:48 PM #
Been workin' on my NYE dish for tomorrow. Captain Karl's Bold Ball. It's a real man's cheese ball, that's off the chain. Ha!

07:52 PM #
Captain Karl's Bold Ball starts with 2 packs of real Philly cream cheese. Don't get "lite" or cheap brand crap. It's a holiday, you guys.

07:53 PM #
Then I add in 2 sacks of shredded pepper jack. It has the hot taste I crave in my mouth when I'm snackin'.

07:56 PM #
Next is a crap load of Frank's. I don't measure, just dump it in and eyeball it for taste. Don't be weak about it though. Just use, "lots."

07:59 PM #
I like to add in a bunch of chopped pickled 'Peños. Pickled 'Peños turn any dish into a crowd pleaser.

08:01 PM #
Now, cook up some bacon in a pan. Like a pack of it. Chop that crap up and mix it in for bold flavor pleasures.

08:02 PM #
Now, put in a few dumps of blue cheese dressin'. Man, it really cools down the heat and lets you keep shovelin' in the ball ASAP.

08:06 PM #
Also, throw some chopped up chives in there. Green color makes it look money and lets the babes know you're gourmet and sensual.

08:09 PM #
Mix all that crap up and make a ball. Then roll it in some chopped nuts. Maybes 'Stachios? Somethin' nice and primo shows class, you guys.

08:11 PM #
Serve Captain Karl's Bold Ball with some a them half pretzel half cracker deals or whatever. Just make sure the babes see you bring it out.

08:14 PM #
When babes see you serve Captain Karl's Big Bold Ball on NYE, man, the midnight countdown passions are guaranteed to be mega carnal & more.

09:56 PM #
Decided to lay off the booze to keep it chillin' and rested for tomorr. Already pretty bombed, so just gonna smoke some chillin' weed.

09:58 PM #
Smokin' weed responsibly 'round the holidays if you're a grown up keeps it chillin' the most, you guys.