Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Tue Jan 29 2013

03:54 PM #
Hospital again today. Cooter got out the hospital. Drove over in his ma's Grand Marquis. Had another stroke. Hit a tree. Back in hospital.

03:57 PM #
Cooter wanted a post stroke celebraish. Said he "needed to drill some slizz and his ma was up his f@ckhole bought restin'." Sounded cool?

04:00 PM #
If you been in the hospital, babes can't resist your carnal vibes. Sickness is a primo afrodisiac. That's a natural fact, you guys.

04:04 PM #
Cooter called Biggie Smalls and Ratface to come by. Had to sit in the hospital waitin' room with those grossouts, and his ma. Nightmare.

04:13 PM #
Crazy Cooter gave me a note to pass. Couldn't talk. Said, "have one a them coozs cum jak my f@kin c*ck." Guess he needed a healing release.

04:16 PM #
After 2 strokes, you probs don't need anymore from babes. (ha! just some guy humor.) Not sure though. I keep my fitness on point.

04:18 PM #
Told Biggie Smalls & Ratface. They went and showed Coot their chest beefers. I supervised to make sure it stayed consensual and chill.

04:19 PM #
Coot's ma came in his room screamin' bought her wrecked Grand Marquis. Saw the carnal vibes. Said, "You trash get the f*ck outta here!"

04:22 PM #
Cooter's got in my grill. Said, "Get your ass gone too or I'll break your arm!" Decided I should split. No need for violence on my pipes.

04:25 PM #
If an older gal threatens you with violence, you should probs listen. Can't crush their face like a street animal. Gotta respect the ladies.

04:29 PM #
Never been into threats. If I want a job done, I ain't punchin' out 'til quittin' time...when Cold One City unlocks the doors, you guys.