Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Sat Feb 23 2013

07:50 AM #
Feel like I drank a thousand margs last night. Really hurtin'. Mighta been over served at Chili's, you guys.

07:52 AM #
The problem with bein' over served is, it always feels right.

07:54 AM #
'Course, if the customer is always right, then you can't ever truly be over served. If I ain't face first in the toilet, keep 'em comin'.

08:02 AM #
Don't know if it's the 4 cold ones I had for breakfast, but Motley Crue's "Ten Seconds to Love" has guitar licks as thick as a Frosty.

08:05 AM #
When Mick Mars' touches an axe, man, it's so thick & rich I wanna dip Wendy's fries in it. The tone is just off the chain.

08:12 AM #
If your Saturday don't sound like this: http://t.co/QMyMcS1zNe, then you don't Saturday right, corncob.

08:15 AM #
Crackin' another cold one. Best things 'bout drinkin' at home is, you're never cut off, and the bar's always open, you guys.

08:22 AM #
Thing about Motley Crue is, you pretty much can't listen to 'em and not smoke cigs. Just feels right.

08:23 AM #
Yes Dave, I am smokin' cigs in the house. What? Do we all of a sudden NOT live in America anymore?

08:26 AM #
Dave said, "Sue don't appreciate cig smoke in the pad." Told him, "No one cares. Sue can appreciate suckin' it." Power move.

08:32 AM #
Yeah, I'm smokin' cigs in the pad, drinkin' cold ones, and not wearin' a shirt. 'Cause it's Saturday. Gonna rock some Scorpions too. USA.

08:36 AM #
I'm the President and CEO of Bad Boy City, USA. And that's the bottom line, 'cause Stone Cold Karl Welzein said so, you guys.

08:39 AM #
Double middle freedom rockets to the sky, back to the world. America, lets do this.