Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Mar 08 2013

06:13 AM #
Happy Friday to ya, you guys.

06:19 AM #
Gettin' real sick of Dave & Sue. Sue won't let Dave take a hot leak unless she checks if the water's clear first.

06:25 AM #
Sue told Dave yesterday she wouldn't try the new Loco Cool Ranch D'Reet Tacs 'cause The Bell makes her "ill." So rude. I was enjoyin' mine.

06:29 AM #
Get so steamed when folks act like they're too good for a little loose stool after enjoyin' the Bell. It's a don't ask don't tell situaish.

06:34 AM #
Sometimes when you're havin' a major life problem, The Bell comes out with a new sensation made of D'reets and it just kinda goes away.

06:42 AM #
Sue was also bein' a pile about Kate Upton on the Swimsuit Ish. Said she was "fat" for a model. Sue should look in a mirror once in a while.

06:44 AM #
If you think Kate Upton is "fat," then we're not friends anymore. Why? 'Cause you suck and you're stupid and you hate America, that's why.

09:54 PM #
Sometimes, I miss my wife and kids, you guys. Not all the time. But, when I can't sleep, my brain tries to think stupids on its own.