Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Thu May 23 2013

07:00 AM #
Really lookin' forward to the weekend, you guys.

07:24 AM #
Crashin' in the 'Bring, catchin' a little snooze. Well earned I might add. Broke 2 blades on a sawzall this mornin', rockin' it SO hard.

07:29 AM #
When you're tearin through steel with a sawzall, fueled by Jack Links and a polite drag of weirdo grass, that's American muscle at its best.

07:37 AM #
Bean Tooth finally showed up today. Said he had a blood clot, but he's "on thinners now and should be chill." So stupid. Just hit the booze.

07:40 AM #
I was wavin' around the sawzall, doin' a little Jackyl, rockin' pretty hard. Bean Tooth said not to cut him or he'd bleed out. So weak.

07:44 AM #
If you have access to a powered saw of some sort, and don't rock a little, Jackyl style, you're not using it right.

07:59 AM #
Bean Tooth said he's hostin' the Memorial D bash cause Cooter's sick of "f*ckers makin' his house a sh*thole." Don't think it's the parties.

08:02 AM #
Bean Tooth said Cooter bought 2 new pillows from Target and now he makes you take off your shoes to come in. Like pillows remove urine odor.

08:04 AM #
There's a huge difference between home FASHION, and home STYLE. That's why I still live in my car, you guys.