Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Jun 07 2013

10:04 AM #
Happy Friday to ya, you guys.

10:20 AM #
Supposed to have a lil' celebraish for a job well done today. Bean Tooth's takin' the crew to somewhere, "real f*ckin' special." So pumped.

10:25 AM #
Most times when someone takes you, "somewhere special," it's 'cause they have a coupon, or want to crush your soul with bad news.

10:32 AM #
"We're goin' somewhere special," can also be concerning if your pals are guidos with questionable employment sources.

10:39 AM #
Hope Bean Tooth rings me up soon with the locaish. Clenchin' pretty hard. Tryin' to ride out the storm 'til I can grunt one in a public.

10:42 AM #
Gruntin' out a stinky in a public john is a great way to have a quick personal vacay on a budget. Kinda like when babes take bubble baths.

10:48 AM #
I gotta say, Arb's new King's Hawaiian roast beef sammies really hit the spot, but man, they also make your guy cheeks hit the toilet seat.

10:49 AM #
Wonder if Arb's calls 'em "King's Hawaiian" 'cause "you'll be doin' the #2 hula on the porcelain throne?" Ha!

10:56 AM #
Wakin' up in your car with stomach pains needin' to grunt out a nasty Arby's crap is just a hazard of chasin' the American Dream, you guys.