Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Tue Jul 01 2014

03:57 PM #
Gotta say a special what's up to America, all across the USA, you guys.

03:58 PM #
Team USA. 2014. Let's roll.

04:01 PM #
Whether you're into soccer or not, it's respectful to shun other responsibilities to support our boys from the Red, White and Blue.

04:54 PM #
Gonna be a 6-pack halftime, you guys.

05:52 PM #
Feel like America should drink a thousand beers for my main man Timmy Howard, you guys.

06:15 PM #
Time to find the bottom of a bottle of somethin' hard and brown with the first name of a Christian man.

06:32 PM #
Goddamnit, you guys.

06:34 PM #
A scoreboard can't make you not be an American anymore. When you're the USA, you always walk off the field a winner.

06:34 PM #
Cold ones are fine for a celebraish, but when the USA takes a hard one, it's time to mainline with America's finest: Jim Beam. Respectfully.

06:35 PM #
Team USA, this tall strong one's for you guys.