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DadBoner - Mon Jul 07 2014

07:30 PM #
Gotta say, the 4th weekend rocked pretty successfully. Don't remember much 'bout the 5th or 6th. That's how you know it was successful.

07:32 PM #
Takin' your bod to death's door with hard brown juice is the least you can do out of respect for those who died for this country.

07:36 PM #
Cooter's bash was nasty. Really off the chain. Were a bunch of bottles of Fireball and everything. Like, several. Had to get my taste on.

07:38 PM #
The difference between drinkin' booze and tastin' booze comes down to the refined palette of a true bad boy with skills like myself.

07:41 PM #
Thanny showed up to Coot's. Uninvited I might add. Cooter said he'd rap to her "bout showin' some motherf*ckin respect." Very chill of Coot.

07:44 PM #
Coot musta rapped some sense into Thanny 'bout givin' me my man space, cause she laid off after they went in his shed for a half hour.

07:49 PM #
Takes a true pal to smooth things over for a babe with you. Coot came outta the hot shed with no shirt on. Musta had a heated talk.

07:54 PM #
Coot said, "That slizz is f*ckin' straightened, Welzein. You're welcome, motherf*cker." Think I saw him havin' a backup talk in john later.

07:58 PM #
Woke up in Coot's empty pool with the hose runnin'. Think I was tryin' to fill it up. Wish the empty bottle of Fireball with me could talk.

08:02 PM #
Fireball should do an ad with a bad boy in an empty above ground pool, covered in filth, holdin' a bottle. Just says, "Fireball. Go hard."

08:07 PM #
Gotta peep into gettin' a big time advert job again. Never see Fireball ads on TV. Could be cleanin' up. Might have to reach out. $$$