Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Sun Sep 07 2014

06:56 PM #
Feel like I drank a thousand beers last night. Really hurtin'.

07:01 PM #
When you're hurtin' the day after from cold ones, if you drink 2-4 more cold ones, you'll be back in Cold One City, USA with mad swag.

07:05 PM #
Nothin' hurts you by helpin' and helps you by hurtin' like ice cold booze, you guys.

07:11 PM #
Dave said, "You might have a drinkin' problem." Told him, "Sounds like you got a problem with good times, assclown." Really burned him down.

07:14 PM #
I don't have a drinkin' problem. I'm not stupid. I'm smart enough to know that they hide feel good treasure at the bottom of brown bottles.

07:17 PM #
Alcoholics drink because they HAVE to. I drink because I WANT to. I'm not some slave to needing crap, you guys.