Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Sun Dec 07 2014

01:50 PM #
Dave said he's gonna get one of those Fitbit things. Says it's an "exercise watch that tones your bod." Idiot.

01:52 PM #
Fitbit's are so stupid. I don't need some crappy digital watch to let me know my body's on time, you guys.

02:00 PM #
Fitbit is such a scam. Basically just makes hefty chubbers think they're gettin' healthy by walkin' to the fridge or the toilet.

02:14 PM #
Told Dave, they should make a Fitbit for the john to let you know how many craps you take. Call it the Fitsh*t. Ha! (Sorry to be crass.)

02:19 PM #
Dave said he used to keep track of his BM activity with a toilet journal. Went in his room to find it. No need for that Dave. NO need.

02:22 PM #
Why would you keep a toilet journal?! So you can revisit past craps taken? Dave is such a grossout sometimes.

02:23 PM #
I'm tryin' watch the Lions game. Not hear about some loose stool you grunted out in 2003, Dave. Idiot.

02:27 PM #
Craps are just good times you had eatin' some grub, turned into bad memories. And should be flushed away to the past, you guys.