Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Fri Mar 13 2015

06:05 PM #
Happy Friday to ya, you guys.

06:14 PM #
Ain't been feeling' myself lately. Feels like a thousand years since I drank a thousand beers. The darkness has fell upon my guy spirit.

06:30 PM #
Sometimes I feel like Eddie VH's Frankenstrat when it's locked in a case, achin' to get out and carnally explode in some babe faces.

06:32 PM #
Haven't seen Dave in about a week or a month. Think he's in his room or dead or who cares. I'm not the pal police.

06:36 PM #
If your roomie dies from drowning in vomit or being a fat garbage person, it's not your job to care. That's probably the law, you guys.

06:40 PM #
Been layin' off the booze and eatin' healthy. But the boredom in my brain from a lack of bold flavors and booze stimulaish is a nightmare.

06:44 PM #
Thing about eatin' right and layin' off the hard booze is; you might FEEL healthy, but you also want to kill yourself, you guys.

06:48 PM #
Ever just stare at a wall and fantasize about a gun barrel, clickin' around in your teeth? That's what not drinkin' booze feels like.

06:50 PM #
Sick of this. Sick of everything. Got $184.75 left to my name. Gonna hit the party store for some Steel Reserve, cigs, and a day dream.

06:50 PM #
Everybody wants some. I want some too, you guys.