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DadBoner - Fri May 22 2015

05:25 PM #
Happy Friday to ya, you guys.

05:29 PM #
Runnin' pretty low on dinero. Might have to collect some more empties so I can celebrate Memorial Day, American Dream style.

05:32 PM #
Everyone's American Dream is different. Currently, mine is fueled 10 cents at a time by returnable bottles and cans.

05:34 PM #
Great thing 'bout America is, whether you're workin' for minimum wage, or diggin' through trash for empties, it's an equal pay situaish.

05:38 PM #
Diggin' through garbage to find some returnables so you can turn 'em in for $ so you can by booze to celebrate fallen troops shows respect.

05:42 PM #
Rather spend a few days knee deep in a dumpster than disrespect our Nation's soldiers by not havin' a Memorial Day cold one cracked.

05:53 PM #
Makin' a mean homemade dip for the Me-mor celebraish. Sour cream with Lawry's and DubShire sauce mixed in. So money, budgetarilly.

05:58 PM #
You only got sour cream, Lawry's, and DubShire sauce left in your fridge? You got dip. Serve with snack chips (your choice) and enjoy.

06:04 PM #
Dave just asked, "You ever see a babe with buttcheeks instead of boobs? Like a front butt, but no mudhole." No, Dave. No. Jeez.

06:07 PM #
Told Dave, "We're done with frontbutt talk this weekend. Tryin' to celebrate the USA, not ponder babes with buttholeless buttboobs." Idiot.

06:11 PM #
Who calls a gal's backdoor area a "mudhole" anyway? Dave's such a grossout. Musta heard it on Maxim or somethin'. Tryin' to be cool.

06:16 PM #
"Mudhole" sounds like a adult jack mag you'd get at an Indiana truckstop. No thanks. Not my style. I'm a Penthouse man.

06:21 PM #
Bought a value jack mag 3-pack in the shrink wrap for a raunchy bachelor gift once. The middle mag was somethin' like "Mudhole." No good.

06:31 PM #
Gotta get to work diggin' through trash. Got no time for Dave's crap. I make my own hours, and there's no shortage on dumpster gold.

06:36 PM #
This Memorial Day weekend, work hard, play harder. (No guy humor intended. Not tryin' to make a crass peener joke, you guys.)