Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Mon Dec 21 2015

06:54 AM #
Really hurtin'. Some guy named J-Bone asked to "lick my b-hole" in the Wendy's parking lot. Been drinkin' it far, far away.

06:58 AM #
Guess this J-Bone guy really needed to taste my man can. Not really the babe action I was craving. Might be puttin' out too many vibes?

07:03 AM #
When a guy tries to french your backdoor in a Wendy's parking lot with, "Hey. Name's J-Bone. Can I eat your tailpipe?" You lose.

07:07 AM #
Sure, I'd been in jail for the night. Guess I took a crap on a Scion outside the Trillium Cinema. But it's not somethin' I wanna talk about.

07:11 AM #
When you make #2 on someone's car, it's not your fault. That's the best excuse and you should probably not go into any further extrapolaish.

07:20 AM #
GUY TIP: Don't blow out a hot #2 in public if you don't want randy guys to request a tongue taste of your backdoor at Wendy's, you guys.

08:30 AM #
Just wanna be clear: I'm not into guy on guy butt stuff. It's chill if that's your thing. But it's not mine. Again, just wanna be clear.