Twitter Fiction Reader

DadBoner - Mon Sep 05 2016

09:42 AM #
Sometimes I forget what year it is then I put on some Bob Seger and who cares.

01:24 PM #
Dave just said, "I think you drank too much." Idiot. I'll rip the door off the fridge if I want. Faster to get stuff. It's a life hack.

01:29 PM #
No such thing as drinkin' too much. If you ain't dead, keep dumpin' 'em down 'til you are, you guys.

01:32 PM #
I'm pretty much the most boss player in the USA. Diamond D Roth might be competish but that's it.

01:34 PM #
I rock thoroughly and successfully 24/7 365. Gonna go on the roof. Scream it to the world 'til I spit blood and fire.

01:58 PM #
Listenin' to my Heart "Dreamboat Annie" tape on my Sony Sports exclusive Walkman on the roof. I'm the man babes crave. Shirt off, natch.

02:00 PM #
Thinkin' 'bout leakin' some internet nudes. Let babes know what I'm workin' with from coast to coast.

02:03 PM #
Smokin' some grass. When you're on the roof smokin' some grass, that's when you know you're smokin' some grass, you guys.