Twitter Fiction Reader

Futurespa - Mon Nov 05 2012

04:20 PM #
Hi, it's Shamika Veranda here, Future Spa astro-journalist, stepping in for a minute with a fun dispatch from the ground!

04:20 PM #
We (i.e. me) caught up with Vic Chestnut in a hallway today, after he emerged - glistening - from one of his daily sauna sessions.

04:22 PM #
Vic's been at the top of his game in many regards for a long time now. Let's check out what he had to say...

04:23 PM #
"Vic, you're known for having the hottest backside attack in the business, so to speak. What was your strategy in the sauna today?"

04:24 PM #
"Hey Shamika. First off I just wanna say I'm happy to be here. Looking forward to eating an omelet and sipping on a smoothie in a moment.

04:27 PM #
"As per your question, first of all, protecting my rear is really important in there...

04:28 PM #
"I take my time combing through the towel stacks, seeking one that's thick yet fluffy.

04:29 PM #
"I also make sure to pick a color that matches my mood. Usually I'm an orange; sometimes a teal with white stripes."

04:31 PM #
"Mmhmm."

04:32 PM #
"I go for a tri-fold on the sauna bench, which provides good padding while not lifting me too high. Don't wanna hit my head on the ceiling."

04:35 PM #
"Is that a risk in there?"

04:36 PM #
"Well, not really. Especially because I sit in Row B [out of three rows]. So unless my neck suddenly grows by a couple feet, I think I'm ok"

04:36 PM #
"Haha! I can't help but notice that you're dripping with sweat. Do you plan to air dry, or towel off?"

04:37 PM #
"Great question. First I'll snag a fresh mid-size towel, and dab myself semi-dry in the key areas, with a deeper dry in some of the crevices

04:38 PM #
"Then I'll walk briskly to the smoothie cart, making sure to cross through the Breezy-Fresh Corridor for a puff of wind and aromatherapy."

04:39 PM #
"Ooh, sounds nice. But back to the sauna. You're known as an interval user, right? You take breaks every 30 minutes or whatever to..."

04:40 PM #
"Precisely. I'm a big fan of refreshing showers, so every 23 minutes I exit the sauna and step into the Minero Springs Waterfall.

04:41 PM #
Each time, it's like a brand new invigorating shower experience. It's hard to describe with words, you know? You just have to do it..."

04:43 PM #
"Tell me more about these shower breaks. Does the radical change in temperature help to exfoliate your skin, or relax your muscles, or..."

04:45 PM #
"Hmm. Not sure I understand the question, Shamika. Like I said, I love refreshing showers. This lets me take 3 or 4 in quick succession."

04:46 PM #
"Sounds fantastic. Vic, thanks for the taking the time to talk with us today. I wish you the best of luck in there tomorrow."

04:46 PM #
"Thanks, Shamika, you too... I mean, best of, you know, take care and see ya."

04:47 PM #
This was Shamika Veranda talking to Vic Chestnut. Coming at you from the hallway outside the sauna. Bye bye!